The Satanic Storytime

I suspect that many of my readers have been awaiting this particular holiday celebration post with excited curiosity. I mean, how on earth will Rebecca handle this? Will kids be sacrificing their stuffed animals? Will they learn to chant in Latin? Will they all learn to proclaim “hail Satan?!”

I have some bad news for y’all: if you are to respect Satanism, then you won’t do a children’s holiday celebration in honor of it.
::whispers:: It’s also why you won’t find truly Satanic picture books.

I’ve gotta say that I totally respect their stance on raising children without indoctrinating them into any sort of belief system. They believe that children should learn as much about life, philosophies, religions, etc. before that mature young adult/adult can make a decision that aligns with what they want to believe (and that includes not becoming a Satanist).

Sort of takes the wind out of the sails of those who reinforce lies to mold children’s behavior into something they believe is “good.”
::major side eye at Santa and Elf on the Shelf::

I highly recommend that you check out the Church of Satan’s FAQs to educate yourself about this belief system. Fake news has been such a huge topic of discussion lately, and it should be noted that Satanists have had to deal with false accusations and flat-out lies for decades.

All that said, I do want to give you some great resources if you truly would like to hold a storytime that implicitly honors Satanism to make sure your programming is truly inclusive.


Did you know that the greatest holiday for Satanists is each individual’s birthday? Well, there’s a ton of resources for you to have a birthday storytime.


Raising intelligent children who know and love themselves? A Satanic value. So do some research and put together a fabulous storytime about self esteem.

I truly hope that this post has made you rethink some things that you may have assumed or believed.

Hey! Why are you posting Holiday storytimes when you don’t believe that libraries should celebrate holidays?!